"In these days, a man who says a thing cannot be done is quite apt to be interrupted by some idiot doing it."

"Error always addresses the passions and prejudices; truth scorns such mean intrigue, and only addresses the understanding and the conscience."

"A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands."

"A good writer is not necessarily a good book critic. No more so than a good drunk is automatically a good bartender."

"The world owes all its onward impulses to men ill at ease. The happy man inevitably confines himself within ancient limits."

"If you think education is expensive, Try Ignorance!!!"

"Murphy Brown is doing better than I am. At least she knows she still has a job next year."

"If a man hasn't got plenty of good common sense, the more science he has the worse for his patient."

"The true masters of the art of living are already happy if they are not unhappy."

"It was beautiful and simple, as truly great swindles are."