"It is a waste of energy to be angry with a man who behaves badly, just as it is to be angry with a car that won't go."

"One act of beneficence, one act of real usefulness, is worth all the abstract sentiment in the world. Sentiment is a disgrace, instead of an ornament, unless it lead us to good actions."

"Californians invented the concept of life-style. This alone warrants their doom."

"Honesty is the recognition of the fact that the unreal is unreal and can have no value, that neither love nor fame nor cash is a value if obtained by fraud."

"Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric."

"Obscenity is what happens to shock some elderly and ignorant magistrate."

"EXTINCTION, n. The raw material out of which theology created the future state."

"The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house."

"No one can disgrace us but ourselves."

"Never esteem anything as of advantage to you that will make you break your word or lose your self-respect."